The idea that another person is meant to complete you, I believe, is very misleading. To me, it feels as though you are being setup for failure if you approach a marriage, a partnership or any relationship from the perspective that you need someone else to make you whole.
In my experience, all relationships are in your life as a mirror reflection of that which needs healing in yourself. And, no matter how painful this can be at times, observing the signs and that which you do not prefer in your relationships, is an extremely useful tool for accelerating your own emotional maturity. I most certainly learned this truth through experiencing it in my own life. Although initially, I believed that I needed to “fix” my relationships to make myself “happy” and bring fulfillment, eventually the true purpose of my interactions with those close to me was revealed. I discovered that I could choose to heal myself through and because of the reflections I observed in others and thereby transform my relationships and my life.
In the movie, “Jerry Maguire”, we heard the term “you complete me” and watched as the other characters swooned in admiration of this devotion of one partner to another. And, although unconditional love is certainly possible in a relationship, it is not achieved by conditioning yourself or anyone else. That would be an example of conditional love. In truth, this blissful state within a partnership is created because you complete yourself first and foremost. You heal yourself and the wholeness you emanate enhances and compliments all partnerships in your life. So, don’t beat yourself up or anyone else to fit into the construct of happiness or unconditional love within a relationship.
Complete yourself and all else falls into place effortlessly.